It’s funny how a Hallmark holiday can bring up so many feelings for people – ebbing and flowing from the lovey dovey to the lonesome. But Valentine’s day, with its tales of Cupid and swan song of chocolates and roses and saccharine sweetheart candies does just that. It’s a strangely divisive one. Where couples are cuddled up and singletons see their requisite froyo as a cup of lonely. But it doesn’t need to be.
I think you need to be your own Valentine.
I think you need to cook that beautiful dinner even when it’s just you, wear your favorite outfit, buy yourself some flowers, and celebrate the self love that often gets muddled when we focus on what we don’t have.
Last season I was chatting with my Suits sister wives, Sarah and Gina, and was in some sort of funk, bemoaning something that was so futile I don’t even remember what it was now. But I was faaaaaar from showing the self love.
One of them stopped me – truth be told I can’t remember which one because they both impart their sage wisdom with me on the daily – but one of the stylish wise ones stopped me and said, “Hey! That’s my friend you’re talking about. Be nice to her.”
They were protecting me from myself. From my own criticism, and my own self doubt. They were reminding me to treat myself as well as I treat those closest to me. To be my own valentine.
This Valentine’s Day I will be with friends, running amock through the streets of New York, likely imbibing some cocktail that’s oddly pink, and jumping over icy mounds in my new shoes through the salted snowy streets of the West Village.
But those shoes, by the way, were my gift to myself. Because I’ve worked hard, because I’m not going to wait for someone to buy me the things I covet (nor do I want to), and because I want to treat myself as well as I treat those dearest to me. Because I am my own funny Valentine.
So whether you have a special someone, you’ll be with friends, or you’ll be flying solo this Saturday (or any other day for that matter), be good to yourself. Love yourself, treat yourself, honor yourself and celebrate you. Be your own beautiful, darling, cherished and funny Valentine. You deserve it.